My Failure

As many of you might know, I had one goal for the last 2 weeks of this summer: to watch all 6 seasons of Lost.

I knew it was an ambitious goal, and there were many doubters and naysayers from day one, but I figured if I was gonna make a goal I might as well shoot for the stars. So I did, and I truly believed that my abilities to watch a crap-load of tv would allow me to accomplish this extremely ambitious goal.

I started off hot, even exceeding expectations by watching 60 of 120 episodes after 6 days, which gave me hope that I truly could do it. But now that there is only 1 day left before school starts I have only watched 90 of 120 and I have to admit to myself and to all my numerous supporters that I am not going to complete my only real summer goal. It hurts to fail. It is a little bit painful because I am letting myself down, but letting all of you down is what really hurts. Knowing that I am failing my friends, family, ancestors, and posterity makes my heart hurt and brings me much shame.

I feel kind of like this right now.

So to all of you out there counting on me, I am sorry. Now you know that I am not perfect and that even I can make a mistake from time to time. But I promise that I will finish Lost in the near future, and that I will do my best to complete all of my future goals so as to not let you or myself down ever again.

I love myself and I hate myself.